Taylor Swift’s Boutte 🍑 opens the ledger and ends the year at 9-5, hanging 2304 on the scoreboard, good for the 4th seed. The point differential reads like a stapler slammed on the desk — plus 248 across the slate, and nobody else is really close. A 7-game run in the middle months quiets the room.

The signature moment is Week 7, when the lineup unloads 251 — the single biggest number posted by anyone in the league all year. They take their lumps too — a 113-point no-show in Week 1 that looks, in hindsight, like the only bad day on the whole schedule.

In the final, Taylor Swift’s Boutte 🍑 runs through Jcrunk’s Touchdown Punks and carves Volume VI into the wall. MattOD11 takes third and goes home with a handshake; Jcrunk’s Touchdown Punks is left studying the plaque wall from the hallway. The receipt prints in ink — another volume, shelved.